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In Egyptian numerology, our Hearts Desire is the numeric calculation of the vowels in our birth certificate name. The vowels in the name are considered fluid and soft, describing the deepest passions and motivators of our heart. They hold our true vision of what we came here to do in this lifetime.

This is where we hold what is near and dear to our heart. It is the frequency of our heart vibration. It is what motivates our passion, purpose, beliefs and points to authenticity. It is inspired and ignited by an Awakening. Until then, it directs our experiences toward maturation teaching us who we are and why we are here.

Because this vibration is linked to our hearts, we can only access it when our hearts are open. Anything blocking us from the flow of our feelings causes us to formulate experiences through our minds leading to imbalance because it does not allow the heart energy body to mature. This is why an “Awakening” can be painful. The walls around our heart needs to come down.. whether by a feather or Sledgehammer. Keeping our hearts open is the journey after we open our eyes.

The awakening process is a personal journey. Everyone who experiences their own awakening arrives at the same destiny and that is with eyes wide open.

A Spiritual Awakening can manifest from several post experiences including a devastating loss, trauma, illness, and painful circumstances that have us trudging out of a period called the dark night of the soul.

Spiritual Awakening is a moment of transcendence and, with awareness, this moment can expand, touching all areas of our lives. Awakening spiritually changes the way we dance through the world allowing an inner sense of peace and stillness to govern our actions and reactions. The Awakening can be a gradual process, or it can happen as if struck by lightning whereby one single event unleashes a flood of insights which changes a person’s perception of reality completely. There is no set explanation as to how an awakening should happen because everybody will experience it in his or her own unique way.

It is not a one-time event, just like waking up in the morning ,an awakening is something we do every day. Spiritual awakening is an ongoing and ever unfolding process. It is walking along our divinely guided path towards fully remembering ourselves as conscious and virtuous beings whereby we begin the journey of peeling away layers of illusion present in the physical world, and choose to become aware of who we really are, and what we know is our truth.

Not all awakenings come from suffering and pain, we can also experience an awakening through deep meditative states of awareness and often times through prayer and contemplation. But those of us who graduate into a higher state of consciousness through pain and suffering need to find peace with our devastating loss. We simply cannot keep our eyes open without healing the past circumstances or we risk being pulled back into the slumber while holding tightly onto our regressions.

For me, it was the trauma of being sexually assaulted as a young teen that threw me on my knees to a spiritual awakening, but post trauma found me still holding onto the feelings of betrayal, rejection, and abandonment. I also had a deep seeded feeling of shame that I carried around with me and although this feeling kept me searching for spiritual solutions, it was not until I faced my demons, healed my fear, and opened my heart that I was able to move on to become a sovereign , authentic, self- loving entity.

This process did not happen overnight. It occurred after continuing to make a series of bad mistakes, poor judgment, and harmful experiences. I just could not understand how my spiritual knowledge and wisdom were expanding but my personal life was in shambles. What I knew and who I was, or my intentions and my actions were out of proportion with who I knew I was and what was driving the vehicle was unresolved emotional baggage that had not been resolved.

PTSD is a perplexing phenomenon. In the book I am writing called the “Path of a Wounded Healer; Liberation is for the Asking”, I have a chapter dedicated to this subject. I re-named post-traumatic stress disorder to “Portal through Spiritual Doors”. I explain a theory based on my own experience.

Often times when a person experiences a life threatening encounter, our Soul leaves the body or disassociates in order to protect ourselves. This can make healing exceedingly difficult because we need a soul retrieval ceremony or process in order to recall the incident so we can become aware of what happened. Sometimes even a hypnoses regression can be helpful under therapeutic observation.

What I am getting at, is that deep emotional trauma isn’t something you just “Get Over”. It is healed differently than our natural day to day losses. An Awakening pushes us to our limits and beyond. It isn’t something that just happens once, it is a continuous process of surrender, release, restore, and reprieve or it will continue to replay.

There are specific number frequencies that we choose to be born under that pre-determined our wounded healer path and even the dark night of the soul. I believe that when we contracted before birth to have a spiritual awakening, we did not take an account the suffering and pain involved but rather we viewed it as a gift of beauty, freedom, and illumination to ourselves and the world. I believe that pain and suffering are by-products of being born into the 3rd dimension.

But we were not in the third dimension when we designed our soul life agreement with our spirit guides. In the spirit realm, being spiritually evolved enough to carry a high frequency such as a Master Number is an honor and privilege.

When we were Born, we passed through the veils of amnesia. Unfortunately, this keeps us in the dark to the advantages of our life’s journey. We simply do not have access to the bigger picture until we are able to tap into a higher consciousness. The reality of our nature is that we are far more than a physical being. We are a multidimensional spiritual being, and yet prior to our present life, we agreed to limit our awareness of this, to fully be immersed in duality, separation, and illusion. Now if we are going through an awakening then we also agreed and set the stage for ourselves to have the experience of waking up and remembering.

In other words, it is our Soul that triggers our awakening process. However, there were several events, books, people, experiences, even movies that may have played a role in our pre-awakening process. All of our life experiences have essentially been preparing us for the journey of peeling back the veil of illusion, rinsing the sleep away from our eyes, and reclaiming our power to co-create in the physical world as a fully awakened Divine Being.

When I work with individuals in my Mentor-ship program, I am able to take them through their Soul Life agreement, explain their contracts in detail, and how to get into alignment with their mission. It takes an enormous amount of willingness, openness, and honesty to break through the veils of amnesia, but our Hearts Desire holds the memories and truth of why we came here.

The veils are thinning, and we are being given access to Ancient teachings from all around the world. They all have one thing in common and that is pointing to the ancient verse of, “Know Thyself and thou shall know the Universe”.

So, no matter what direction our lives have woven, rest assured that the vital information we seek about ourselves is never lost, we put it safely where it can be decoded in our Hearts Desire Number.

You can learn more about your Heart’s Desire Number in my Book “Egyptian Numerology; Emergence into the 5th Dimension”


The Heart’s Desire number is the sum total of the vowels in a name. Reduce the total to a single digit unless it is a Master Number. Use the arithmancy conversion chart below. The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and sometimes Y. The letter Y is used as a consonant except when it is the first letter in a person’s first or last name, such as Yolanda, Yvon, or Yvette. The letter Y is considered a vowel if there are no other vowels in the name, such as Bly or Flynn.

JOHN EVANS DOE/ 6+5+1+6+5= 23 (2+3=5)TOTAL=5

A J S – 1 B K T – 2 C L U – 3 D M V – 4 E N W – 5 F O X – 6 G P Y – 7 H Q Z – 8 I R – 9


The superpower of the master number forty-four is in enterprise and business toward the path of sacred order. You have the ability of attracting resources in perfect harmony with nature and our environment. I envision you as a pure electrical current of energy balancing commodities in the perfect flow of giving and receiving.

This number is the vibration of self-discipline, abundance, and success through balance. Balancing between the two worlds— family/work, spirit/Earth, emotions/logic—forty-fours need to build a strong foundation in each of these areas. Balancing issues come up around the number eight, and the number forty-four is about business building and how it can be related to benefit the present and the future generations.

Forty-fours combine the strengths of the master numbers eleven, twenty-two, and thirty-three. Not only can they foresee and implement what is needed to create something monumental; they also want that bigger picture to help humankind in a big way. They are insightful like the eleven, creative like the twenty-two, nurturing like the thirty-three, plus they refuse to be intimidated by any challenges.

The master number forty-four/eight is known for magnificence and manifestation. It is a master architect and alchemist whose leadership skills can transform an idea and structure into a powerful and life-altering accomplishment. The forty-four is to go beyond the hard work of the mundane and to see each moment as a creative challenge. The obstacle to push through might be perfectionism in order to gain humility.

Your primary gift is in stability and correcting establishments that are corrupt by exposing truth, repairing injustice, and rebuilding sacred structure. You can bring natural order through communication, communities, and institutions. With your ability of attracting accumulation, flow, and balance, your Hearts Desire is to assist the world of business by bringing it back to right and high order. You have extraordinary talent for organization and envisioning complex and unreachable ideas but are fully capable of following through with your ideas.

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“Egyptian Numerology; Emergence into the 5th Dimension”


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